I hate the University of Louisville

A lot. I hate their campus, let’s start there. There’s no parking, I have to park half a mile away from campus. Some suckers pay money to park their car a mile away at the stadium lot and take a bus to campus. They don’t have to pay the bus fare if they have their student id on them, hopefully they don’t forget it in their dorm rooms. There is a parking garage, but the permit is expensive and they don’t de ice it in the winter so unless you feel dealing with lawsuits on ice before your classes, you’re better off parking in one of the neighborhoods adjacent to the campus. Also, why are the only roads into the campus train crossings? Didn’t anybody foresee *gasp* trains coming along on the tracks and detaining people for ten minutes (I counted.) Today I got off work, rushed to the Ekstrom campus to request some transcripts be sent, and waited over ten minutes while the train passed. I had five minutes to get to the office and pay the lady to send my grades off. And why does their book store close at 4pm on Fridays? Nobody else in the whole city works and needs to study on a weekend night? Nobody who might need a highlighter? (Neon Green, thanks)

What else makes me mad is how rude they were to me when I first enrolled there. I hit a glitch in the computer system, and drove down, parked half a mile away, stood in line, and a snotty women behind the desk told me, “Well I can’t help you while you’re here, OBVIOUSLY.” Just like that! She was so rude. Like, how could I think that the registrar’s office could help me register. LOL, I dunno. And why are they charging students over $500 a year for a mandatory meal plan? The reason they gave to students was that “students who ate on campus had better grades,” which sounds like a massive case of correlation not meaning causation. Then today I heard a spokesperson on the radio talking about how the increase was to improve the eating center, and would be scales back to $250 a semester, in light of economic hardship. WHAT? This is the school I had to pay $25 in cash, just to walk my records from one room to another in the same building. Or in reality, after several phone calls and office visits, I had to go to the office that had them, and walk it down there myself; for $25 in cash. And if you ever go to UofL, bring cash. Using a debit or credit card for any transaction demands a $10 fee, 

And what the hell is it with the Cardinal One card?  I went to their health services, and was so put off by the facile answers the staff gave me that I didn’t even check myself in. I’ll be condescended to at the university hospital, thanks. I had to pay $200 for health insurance just to enroll, and then couldn’t get it back when I waived it. The credit was on my account, but nobody knew how to get it back to me. After several hours stalking offices, I managed to get half of it refunded, but they couldn’t just cut me a check. I started being hounded by the card company, like, getting three phone calls a day to my cell phone that couldn’t be returned because they led to a machine somewhere. Once I set my mind to getting ahold of somebody, and eventually did, but the woman who called me told me that my cell phone must be broken. I only got the other half of the credit back because my work gave me a check for tuition, and I got to keep what I didn’t owe due to the credit.

Also, their advising sucks. I went to the advisor for the psychology department, and he told me bluntly, “You can’t get this degree here.” uuuuh, but it’s an offered program, and it’s what my tuition remission covers. No. There was a class I needed and it wouldn’t be offered again for 4 years. 4 years? yup. 4 years. I needed a statistics class that wasn’t going to be offered and nothing else would do. Luckily (?), it wasn’t an issue. I couldn’t get any other of my classes, either. Did you know they estimate graduation rates on the basis of them taking 6 years? I do, now. I ended up taking the class and doing terribly. Then another counselor told me to take the sociology statistics, which would also count and is offered every year. I was floored. I had worked shit jobs and lived in a dangerous, dingy apartment near campus to wait for this class to roll around and it turned out I didn’t need it in the first place. 

Then I couldn’t get a job after I graduated, maybe a little guidance or employment assistance? No. Just some fanfare. Cue continuing education:

 I enrolled in post baccalaureate classes in an attempt to finish my second bachelor’s in english, and get a head start on my master’s degree. All good intentions, right? I drove a forklift at the time, and my work paid for one graduate class. They would pay a certain amount for any school’s tuition, but for my purposes, it was one class. Then the office worker at the bursar’s office told me to go ahead and enroll in any level course I wanted, because post baccalaureate students have access to the same classes as graduate students, just cheaper; so I could take two classes. This way, I wouldn’t have to apply to the graduate program, I could just take a class and see if I liked it and earn some credit and maybe a letter of reference. Good deal, right?

I enrolled in one course, then when enrolling in the next, a graduate course,  got an error message “must receive instructor’s permission to enroll” on the second one. Not a big deal right? I’ve never had a  professor turn me down to be enrolled in a class. Confident that I would be admitted to the class in question, I applied for the loan for that particular class through my work. Fast forward to the first day of class, I pull into the first available parking spot at a meter, the only one available, being that it is the first day of monday classes, which is a week after the first day of classes because for some reason UofL makes Thursdays and Fridays their start days, so Monday only classes get skipped. Anyway, I pulled in to the spot, and the meter was broken and took all my money, but I was going to be late, so I had to leave my car, and ended up getting a $25 ticket. 


Then I had trouble with the class. The professor was very happy to let me in, and signed the “request to enroll” slip I brought her, but then her department wouldn’t sign it. They told me that since I was enrolling through the psychology program, I needed to have the psychology department sign it. I work until 3:30, so the next day I rushed to the psychology department to find a locked door. That’s when I learned they close at 3. The next day I went in the morning, and was told that I needed to go trough the department of education. The campus is rather sprawling, and what I thought would take 30 minutes became an hour as I walked back and forth and searched for the offices in sub zero weather holding a little slip in my hand with the professor’s permission. 


I got to the office and the director refused to see me. I sat in her waiting room, and realized i’d be late to work. At my work, being late counts the same as being absent, so I called in to give myself more time to work out my classes. I had hoped to persuade her to come out and be reasonable, but she had her secretary shuttle messages back and forth about how there was no way I could enroll, that the professor doesn’t get to make the decision (no matter what the prompt on the enrollment page said), and that there was no appeal process. Or rather, her secretary did. 


I had stayed at my crappy job, in a city I have lost my love for, to take these classes. These classes, and the idea that I had a purpose, were all that was keeping me afloat emotionally. I was freezing and sweating and trying not to cry and the only person there to comfort me was a temp worker on a computer, who only momentarily stopped typing. I couldn’t drop my other my class and cut town, The delay from the odd schedule meant I had to pay half the tuition anyway. I couldn’t enroll in another class, I had already received my loan for the class I hadn’t gotten into, to be paid upon completion. 


And how am I less than a year from having an English degree, but still don’t qualify for an English minor?

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